2012-07-05

LA Noir

This game is bullshit. It's barely even a game, essentially an interactive movie, and nothing you do in it makes any sense. Each scene starts out with you watching about sixteen hours of tedious cutscene, and then you have to do some boring shit for no apparent reason.

Searching for clues takes ages, because there's no indication of where useful clues might be, and is completely pointless since the game just straight-up tells you when you've found everything useful, meaning that you know exactly when to stop.

Chasing suspects is completely free of drama or excitement since you run exactly as fast as they do and the chase ends at a scripted point where you catch up with them.

The driving seems to be from a completely different game since you can behave like a complete maniac and no one gives a shit. If you actually crash into something your partner makes a token complaint, but it has absolutely no repercussions. I'm pretty sure I run some guy down at one point and no one batted an eye.

And questioning witnesses and suspects is just a complete guessing game. There's yet another interminable cutscene and then you have to choose "truth", "doubt" or "lie". There's no apparent way to know which of these to choose since they won't actually lie until after you select "lie" and "doubt" seems to mean "just make some wild accusation for no reason". And if they are lying, then you get to play the "try to guess which bit of evidence will turn out to be incriminating" game.

At one point I failed a mission for "contaminating the crime scene" because I reversed my car. I did it again just be sure, and yep, driving forwards was fine but going backwards was somehow a problem, even though the road was clear in both directions and I was nowhere near the body lying on the footpath.

This game is slow, dull and pointless. A complete waste of time.

No comments:

Post a Comment