The Benevolent Society of Angry Misanthropes: How about some games?

I tried putting a Twitch streamer on on one screen while trying out video games on the other. Didn't work. At all. Couldn't pay enough attention to either. Oh well, games.

Galactic Civilizations II

A cutscene started playing when I ran the game, but there was a product key popup in the corner of the screen, so I tried to make that go away and accidentally skipped the cutscene. I hope there was no information I needed in that!

Main menu contains an entire submenu of tutorials. Bad sign. The first tutorial explains the concept of the main menu to you. I'm already dreading this.

OK, it's just Civilization but in space. Honestly, if I want to play this kind of game I'll probably just play Civ 1 or 2, because I already know how. I did have a little fun creating the anarchist collective of Strongbadia though.

Heat Signature

"Heat Signature is a game from the developers of Gunpoint where you break into spaceships, make terrible mistakes, and think of clever ways out of them." Well there's no part of that I don't love.

OK, I'm not in love with the visuals, but I played the tutorial and, yep, I'm going to play all of this game. The gameplay seems fantastic.

Leviathan: Warships

I think this might have been withdrawn from sale, since clicking the button to go to its store page just takes you to the main page. And it looks like it was largely multiplayer focused, so... Anyway, it's a turn-based naval battle game. Not my thing, thanks.

Layers of Fear

I don't think I skipped a cutscene or anything, but I have no idea who I am, where I am, or what I'm supposed to be doing in this game. You find yourself in a big house and "spooky" stuff starts happening for no reason. Also, there are sort of puzzles but not really. Like, I found a combination lock and looked around for some clue to open it. The wedding invitation for 2pm on the 9th of June? Nope. No combination of 2, 6 and 9 works. Then I happened to see that I could light a candle and suddenly a ghost just gave me the combination.

The ghost, by the way, seems to know who the player character is and has all these very specific messages for them, but they mean nothing to me. At one point I took a cover off a painting and got the "It's covered up for a reason" achievement, but I have no idea what that reason might be. It's just a painting.

If you find sound effects and things moving around for no reason scary, maybe you'll like this game. If that's the sort of thing you're into. For me though, this is boring and pointless. I even turned the lights off to give it a fair shake, but I'm sorry, spooky sounds and things moving for no reason in a video game isn't scary unless I feel like there's some element of danger. Which there isn't here.

Metal Dead

Ugh, zombies. MSPaint-looking zombies. And shitty characters. At least the shittier of the pair dies really quickly. Still not going to play it.

Mordheim: City of the Damned

Another one with a whole menu of tutorials. And this one had an opening cutscene that went on forever. And unlike Galactic Civilizations II, this one doesn't seem to be just a reskinned version of a game I already know. Nor does it have an adequate in-game tutorial. I might give this one another chance at some point, but it's going to take more time and focus than I want to put into it right now. Like, actually watching/reading the tutorials for a start so I know what all these icons all over my screen mean.

Nuclear Dawn

OK, this is some kind of online deathmatch game. You can play against bots as well, but I've already got Unreal Tournament so I'll just play that if I want this kind of game. Also it seems to be heavily team-based, and I'm not for that. I just want to shoot mans, not shoot some mans and help other mans (who look very similar so I'm likely to shoot the wrong mans a lot of the time).

Oil Rush

RTS. Not for me; I hate these games. Even if this one does have the odd twist that the protagonist is an Australian who, in this alternate reality where the whole world is under water because the Nazis got nuclear weapons and won World War 2, works for the Nazis. When the obvious Nazi analogue showed up in a cutscene at the start I was like "OK, this is the bad guy" but then it turned out he's your character's boss and has been like a father to him. I'm guessing you'll probably realise that nazis are bad later on as the plot progresses, but it's a bit of a surprise at the start of the game.

Osmos

I played this for 30 minutes in 2011, and I kind of remember it. You're a blob and you have to absorb other blobs.

Yeah, this is all right. Starts very simple, with all the other blobs just drifting randomly, but then adds stuff like gravity and other blobs that can propel themselves as you can. It's more a way to kill time than something I can see myself sitting down to play for any serious period. I'd probably play a lot of it if I had it on a phone or tablet, but on PC I'm not sure.

Plain Sight

Apparently I played this for 8 minutes in 2015. Seems to be some kind of weird third-person deathmatch game. Kind of like a 3D Liero I guess? It crashed twice before I managed to actually play any of it, but that's not even the reason I won't be playing any more.